Here we are a week on. I purposely didn't write anything during the week because I wanted to try and settle a little in the new job first.
Monday was a rough one if I'm honest, but then I was expecting it to be. I always hate the first day in a new job with all the faffing it involves. I walked almost the whole way home too (2 miles), so I had sore feet, being mostly a desk dweller for so long. Hub was a star though and cooked dinner, did the dishes, ran me a bath and gave me a foot rub afterwards. He's been simply wonderful this week.
I think I've started to settle in a bit now. The people are alright and I'm beginning to get used to the ways of the place, which has involved unlearning the habits that I had from my last full time job. It's a very similar company in that it's a supplier, but the way it all works is very different. It's smaller, so we all do a bit of everything rather than my own cut and dried little bit of responsibility that I'm used to. Thursday and Friday were pretty good as I felt like I was becoming more useful and learning a lot of the things I need to be up to speed with.
It's been scary. I have so many bad associations after my last job that I was waiting almost with my breath held for things to be unpleasant. Then there's the fear that I would instantly be plunged back into the misery I was feeling previously and that the despression would return in a flash. Sounds silly when I write it all down, but I really was terribly afraid of it being instant trauma and doom. I have to do this job, at least in the short term, and I need to hold myself together. So far I'm OK, but I'm still not relaxed about it. Hopefully that will come soon.
I didn't manage to do any creative work at all in the week. I guess I was a bit wary in making sure I chilled out in the evenings and nursed myself through the first few days. I was determined not to waste my weekend though, especially since in future I'll be working either Saturday or Sunday. They haven't put me in the rota yet, so I got to have a full weekend off.
Saturday I was so tired. It took my be surprise, as I'm always up and busy first thing. I ended up going back to bed for an hour mid-morning. Once I'd caught up a bit I managed to get all my washing and ironing done, which felt very encouraging. We had a relaxing evening and an early night; most indulgent!
Today I've worked my socks off finishing my commission paintings so I can send them off to my customer. I needed to get this batch out of the way so I can start the next project, which will be more time consuming (some scuplted masks). I also found an hour to pop to Ikea and grab some new picture frames.
So I've managed to complete a week in work and still get some art done on my days off. I'm really pleased and I hope with every fibre of my being that things will continue as well going forward.
Here are the paintings that are ready to be sent off